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    « Pass the popcorn, life is getting interesting... | Main | Transformation »

    Ask for help

    Anyone who has worked with me or followed this journal knows that one of the main themes in my work with people is encouraging people to let go of the struggle and be willing to ask for help.

    A while back I came across a study that had been done on drowning and how drowning occurs -- surely not the most pleasant thing to read about, but very important stuff.

    There were a few surprising findings: most drowning victims drowned within 30 seconds of getting into trouble and almost everyone drowned mainly because they panicked and struggled. Another finding: most everyone who drowned did so within sight and earshot of someone.

    The strangest fact was this: the people who drown almost never call out for help. They panic, they flail, they choke on water and they quietly drown.

    And almost all of them would have survived if they hadn't panicked. After all, the human body  floats fairly well especially in salt water. Some of them would have survived if they had called out for help -- but because of shock, or fear, or embarrassment, they didn't get around to letting someone know they were in trouble. Pride can cost you everything.

    Struggle is always a sign we're in over our head. Relaxed people "float," meaning they move through life with grace and ease. They find solutions, they locate resources.

    Heroics are usually a risky business -- better to proceed deliberately and calmly, without struggle.

    Relax. No one can handle any and every situation, and no one needs to. There is no shame in asking for help.


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